Loss and Joy - Mother's Day 2013

I hadn't planned to post for awhile, but I read this article today, the day after Mother's Day. I knew I had to share it. I found myself wiping tears while I sat at my desk at work.

This year, I have a beautiful baby girl to hold and cuddle. It's absolutely amazing. If God himself came down and said, "Kerry, tell me exactly what you want in a baby girl and I'll give it to you," I would have described our Baby Z.

Unfortunately, as happy as she makes us, we are still missing a daughter. That loss is still there. That hurt is still there. And it still popped up on Mother's Day. It's easier now, but that pain still manages to find its way to the surface.

I read this article and thought this author must have written it for me or even about me because I could relate to all of it. For me, Mother's Day will always be bittersweet - a day full of joy for my sweet, beautiful baby girl and a day of loss for our daughter no longer with us. I hope someday they both know how much they are loved and how they each changed our lives in such a profound way. :)

Article
Mother's Day: On Loss and Joy by Carrie Goldman

Mother's Day 2013

Taking a break

Our sweet little girl is almost four months old. I can't believe how fast its gone. She is such a sweet baby and absolutely beautiful (if I may say so). We are loving every minute of being her parents. She definitely keeps us on our toes. This is one of the reasons I've decided to take a step back from this blog. I'm not going away, just taking a break. It takes a lot of time to write consistently and keep up a wordpress blog. I'd rather be spending it with our daughter. Plus, we have yet to finalize the adoption. We're hoping it will be soon, but it's possible it could be a few more months.

I'll leave you with a little peek at Miss Priss.

Take care. :)

Rainbow Decor

I'm loving my new subway art from Franchesca at Small Bird Studios. What do you think?

Weekend Wrapup

Baby Z had a big weekend. She had her pictures taken and made her first visit to Cracker Barrel. She was so good too. Even the waitress bragged on her. Of course, she thought she was beautiful so I know I'm not biased.  ;)

I can't wait to see her other pictures. We got a sneak peak on facebook last night. You can see it in the collage below. She hated her dress. It was too poofy and itchy for her taste. She let me know about it too. LOL

I think she may be getting ready to start teething. Lately, she can't seem to keep her fist out of her mouth. She's also been eating like crazy. Hopefully, we're getting ready for a growth spurt. I haven't weighed her in over a week and I'd loved to know how much she weighs. I may try to do that tonight. I had to pull out all of her 3 months clothes because most of her newborn is too small. Granted, the majority of the 3 months is a little big, but they fit better than the newborn. My ittle bit is growing!

Daddy's on Spring Break this week, but her Nana (my mom) and Mamaw (my mother-in-law) are still taking care of her. They don't want to give up their daily snuggles. Ha! Plus, she loves to visit with them. Can you say spoiled? It's already happened. Lord help us.

Next week we have our final post placement visit. I'm not sure what that entails, but I'm hoping we'll get some idea about when our finalization will take place. We are so excited for that day to get here! I'm keeping my fingers crossed for sometime in April, but I wouldn't be surprised if it's more like May. But, at least it's sooner than later.

Unbelievable

I ran across this article on The Huffington Post today - Religious Right Calls Chief Justice Roberts’ Adoption of 2 kids Second Best. There are so many things wrong in this article...so many.  I won't even get into how I feel about the social/religious side of this. That just makes my head spin.

What makes me even angrier is that someone has the audacity to say adoption is "second best" and then goes on to say that every adopted child was not wanted by their birth parents. I can promise you ZB's birth mom loves her unconditionally. If there had been a way to parent, she would have done so. I find these comments derogatory towards birth parents. I'm sure there are those that fall into this category, but adoption cannot be lumped into one nice little corner. And the "second best" comment? Grrr.

I remember my husband and I telling his parents the Christmas before we were married that we planned to adopt. It was always in the cards for us. Did it happen the way we planned? No, but it was by no means second best. How dare anyone say my daughter was an afterthought, a second best option. That is the meanest and yet, silliest thing I've ever heard!

So, shame on this man and shame on all those who agree with his rant. In the meantime, I'll be snuggling on my beautiful daughter.